Episode Guide

There are only so many stories. As we move further down in the barrel are obliged to scrape the sides for content, as this cheeseburger has only partaken in and/or witnessed life for thirty years and in none of those years was he a space astronaut or a victim of an exciting war or a globe-trotting child-actor with fabulous wealth and/or things.

I have compiled an Episode Guide, so you can see which stories have already been told and which have been left to be told another time. If you have any interest in the matter, tell me which untold stories you might be interested in reading.

The phrase "but that is another story and shall be told another time" comes from the Ralph Mannheim translation of Michael Ende's The Neverending Story, and is probably the intellectual property of some multinational corporate AI with lawyers for neurons.

It is used without permission.

CheeseburgerBrown Episode Guide - Year of the Dog, Q1

1975: No data
1976: My first memories
1977: Drive-in movies, playing with stuff, moving to Toronto
1978: On Enemies, Part I; What Art Is: When I Was Young and Ancient Greek
1979: What Art Is: Event Horizon
1980: My brother is born; I see The Empire Strikes Back twice
1981: My sister is born; my parents are separated; I'm loaned to a childless couple
1982: My parents are divorced, and I kick a girl at school
1983: On Enemies, Part II
1984: Two Households, One Cheeseburger; John Smith's Art Studio
1985: On Enemies, Part III; Famously Sweaty
1986: Rapscallion Relish: Pink Iron; On Enemies, Part IV
1987: Rapscallion Relish: Alt Dot School; What Art Is: Redux
1988: Rapscallion Relish: Headmaster Poo; On Enemies, Part V
1989: The Wrap Party; On Enemies, Part VI
1990: A Cheeseburger in Paris; There's Something About Marianne
1991: 666 Rules For Dating My Teenage Lesbian; Touring Europe with the Black Serb
1992: Brat Punk Discordia; On Enemies, Part VII; On Enemies, Part VIII
1993: The GreatRock'n'Roll Swindle; Wicked Witch of the West; The B.B. Girls
1994: The Sicilian's Apprentice; Red Vicious Angst Theatre; Lipgloss Gypsy
1995: Salty Dog East: Part I; On Enemies, Part IX; Salty Dog East: Part II
1996: Salty Dog East: Part III; What Art Is: Climax; My Very Own Cowgirl
1997: The Geek Brunch & Falcor's Love; Father's Footsteps
1998: My Cat's Girlfriend; All-Canadian Sumo Roadtrip; Mac User Discovers Computers
1999: Four Corners of a Box; The Fattest Indians I Ever Knew
2000: The Sweet Funk of Revenge
2001: Touring Europe with Littlestar
2002: Ode to Littlestar; First Trimester Report
2003: Third Trimester Report; The 25 Day Loaf; The 10 Day Shimmy
2004: Schoolhouse Rock; Three Days in La-La Land; 17 Drawings; Three Visits
2005: HuSistock; Goodbye to Kitty; Clap If You Believe in Faeries; A Terrible Beauty
2006: This document


Kate said...

I would love to read about your tour of Europe. You and your wife have such a beautiful relationship that it's a joy to read about.

Will Powers said...

I like the title "I am a cheeseburger!" very original...

Cheeseburger Brown said...


To tell the whole truth, we fought a lot in Europe. I remember thinking, "She drives me nuts and yet I still love her. Maybe this is serious."


Simon said...

Given my fanaticism, bordering on an unhealthy obsession, with most things Star Wars, I'd like to hear about 1980's Empire episode.

I'll end up reading whatever but, you know, that's my vote.

Sith Snoopy said...

All of it. :)

You write so well, that even if you were writing about paint drying, I'd have to read it. ;)

So even if you consider some of the items on your list boring, I still want to read them. ;)

Teddy said...

I'd like to hear the 1991 stories, "666 Rules For Dating My Teenage Lesbian" and "Touring Europe with the Black Serb". They sound interesting, and oddly enough your nonfic is just as good as your fic, likely due to the significant wordsmithing. I wish I had your vocabulary!

Always a fan,

Erica said...

I'm all for hearing about your viewing(s) of Empire Strikes Back, too! Also, your being loaned out in childhood. Thanks for sharing any and all. :-)

Makita said...

I think i'd like to hear about "My Very Own Cowgirl," just to have a continuation of your Salty Dog stories, since i assume that's what it would pretty much be about.

Ewan said...

I would vote for the "666 Rules" and the "Touring Europe with Littlestar" stories in terms of stories to be told.

However, I'd be even more interested in seeing the time go toward your next online serial novel - assuming you have any thoughts of doing another one.

"bvmngd" eh? Seems like an acronym for a series of swear words... :-)

Cheeseburger Brown said...


The thing is: I am working on a new novel, but it's destined for traditional publishing not online publishing. In the meantime I'm just looking for some soft-stuff to attack for blogging/exercise purposes.

Though I admit I do have a short story that is peripherally related to "SoS" which should be ready to see the light of the Web soon.


Mr Bates said...

Thank you for the guide. Unfortunately I discovered you only too recently and this helps me get caught up. As far as what to write next? It matters not. Just keep it coming. And quickly!

mandrill said...

Marvellous news about the SoS related short. :D
What about the fiction? It would be nice to see where each peice appears in the chronology. It would allow us, the readers to know the context of the events surrounding their writing.
Looking forward to the "real" novel too, and the release of SoS.
Keep whislting. :)


Bob said...

I want to hear more about Europe.

Anonymous said...

Mr Brown, I am saddened to inform you that Mr. Axelrod is at it again.


A Friend.

K. R. Robling said...

I loved Darthside, but everything I've read of your work, thus far, has been well worth the time. Whatever you write, just keep sharing it, please.

Anonymous said...

Hi, came across your trimester reports while googling something child related one day and your site came up. I have a ten month old son. Your stories are funny and clever. I relate to your sense of humour as well. It feels weird to read about some stranger's personal experiences, but I find myself always checking your website out and reading more everytime my boy goes down for a nap. Its total obsession. What is this? It's weird. I don't even know what a blog is....an online diary that everyone can read? Do you keep anything a secret? Glad you don't 'cause I like you writing. You should aim for more "real" publishing. Its hard though, I know. My hubby has sent off two books to numerous publishers and always gets those damn rejection letters. Luckily, he doesn't take himself too seriously though. He's a good writer too. Maternity leave is almost over for me, but I have enjoyed reading!

Anonymous said...

Over the past three weeks, I think I've gone through every single piece that you have posted there. Really fantastic stuff.

Personally, I'd like to read "My Very Own Cowgirl" and "Touring Europe with the Black Serb". I'm sure that I'll enjoy whatever you post next, regardless.